We left UVA in October of 2012 with no real conclusions, things were still to be determined.  I felt like surgery was questionable, I always have.  A gut feeling I guess.  I don’t want to be a candidate but there is a part of me that doesn’t want to be told that its out of the question.  Too final I think.  Over the course of the ten years that I have had epilepsy, I have been told that my case is a touch tricky.  I have frontal lobe epilepsy which is the 2nd most common type.  Understand that percentages vary or change but I have been told, in a way to help me understand, that roughly 60% of people with epilepsy have temporal lobe and 40% have frontal.  The type of seizures us epileptics have are different of course.  My Dr. at UVA said that even though I am in the 40%, I am a small portion within that 40%.  I have an obvious lesion but it is in a hard spot.  It’s crazy how all these tests come together to help determine surgery success.  It’s interesting to hear Dr’s explain how one test can combine with another and then another.  All in the hope of determining where the seizures fire from.  My next test was schedules for December – neurocognitive assessment test.  So I had approx. 2 months before my return to UVA.  In the meantime I had the new medication Vimpat to get started on.  I believe I mentioned my experience with Vimpat at another point in my blog but I don’t remember when or where.  This is not an un-common occurrence for me.  The gist, I didn’t last very long on it.  I became ugly, frustrated, annoyed, emotional and just plain awful to be around.  In the matter of about three weeks I was a mess.  The final straw came when I freaked out on Bailey, T and Ms. H at the gym one day.  I was a totally different person and we had to leave.  My head was spinning and it felt like I was watching myself outside of my own body.  I was shaking and twitching all over the place.  That was the last I could take of that medication.  I called my Dr. and said I didn’t think Vimpat was for me.  They instructed me to drop the medication immediately.  Apparently the side effects I was experiencing fall under the “drop this medication if you feel….” category.  It was crazy how quickly my emotions turned around.  That medication was awful, I had never felt so out of control.  Thankfully that was resolved quickly and I could focus on my next step in the whole surgery process.  I was set to have the neurocognitive assessment test the beginning of December.  I was given an idea of what to expect with the test so that was what I prepared for.  In the end I wasn’t prepared.  I had no idea the test was going to be like it was.  It was much harder than I thought, I don’t just mean from a knowledge standpoint either.  I had no idea I would feel the way I did during the test or how I would feel after.  It was nothing like I thought it would be.

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