How’s it going everyone? I’ve been to the gym and am prepared to continue on with a positive, successful day.
So I wanted to follow-up with my last post. I asked you all to let me know what your struggles are when it comes to health and fitness. I was and wasn’t surprised to hear that many of our battles are the same. I say surprised because I often feel like I am the only one who thinks I don’t handle health and fitness well. Obviously I really know it’s not just me but when I am struggling, rationality goes out the window. When I am in a negative mood I will start thinking that I can’t do anything right. Add to that my medications, actually just epilepsy in general, and I can be pathetic. It’s horrible when I do that. I hate that I fight to act normal around my daughter and that my husband has to deal with my ridiculous moods. I can get to where I don’t even want to take accountability for myself. I will tell myself its ok I didn’t exercise because I couldn’t get to the gym. Yeah, well I have a gym in my home so I have no excuses!! None. I know how much better I feel when I eat right and exercise, why do I stray from it? Stupidity!! I’ve decided I absolutely have to take control and I am bouncing back from my sour mood. I am and will be in control.
Early this morning I read a post that my cousin put on facebook. He mentioned a few things but overall it was about instant gratification. I know I know, you had no idea that I wanted immediate results with health and fitness. Yeah, I’ve only told you all that Tony has told me a million times to knock that shit off. I am a person who wants immediate results though. I have fallen for the commercials and advertisements telling me that I could see significant weight loss if I just spent money on a certain pill, diet program or exercise machine. I simply ignored the part that said pills, plans or machines should be used along with healthy diet or exercise. I wanted that 30 day transformation. Seriously, I was 258 and I thought I would be 140 in 30 days? Anyway, I no longer purchase any products but I do ignore the advice I ask for. I’ve done really well the last few days, especially with exercise. It is making that decision and committing. Tony has said it a million times and my cousin said it today – we have to work for the results we want.
I’ve had the exercise part down but for the last 8 to 9 months I have been trying to get the diet part right. I’ve let the weight gain from eating more bother me. I’ve given the scale too much power. This last slump I was in was pretty bad and I can not let that happen again. I won’t do that to my family or myself. Being healthy and fit is hard and can not be achieved over-night.
My Cuz reminded me of the shit I have fallen for for many years. Though I don’t fall for the diet gimmicks anymore, I do expect Tony to say something to me that is going to make everything click. Thing is he already has. I’m the one that has to put it together and I did that this morning. I have the words that push me most typed into the notes app on my phone. I leave it open and every time I lose patience with myself I read through the words and then move on.